Wednesday, May 16, 2012

May 16

As some of you may already know, one of the more bizarre after-effects of my abdominal surgery of 2011 is a surgical hernia. It was found in September 2011, when I realized that I had a hard, kind of pokey-outy area in my belly button area. ... When I had my follow-up with the oncologist for my Sept scans, I asked about it and was told that it wasn't anything to worry about and should heal itself - in the next year or two.

Awesome, possum. Just what I wanted. A weird, bulging, area in my stomach that should heal itself in two years. ... But good news! Now I have another tumor that will have to get cut out of me, and the hernia will be corrected with that surgery. (And then I'll be super duper careful and ridiculously obsessive with the wearing of the binder to be sure this doesn't happen again.)

Every once in a while, I look down or feel my stomach and I roll my eyes at how lopsided my stupid stomach is. ... But when I mention it to a friend, they invariably say something along the lines of "I just don't see it."

People, my friends are liars. Well meaning and loving liars who are making an honest effort to draw my attention away from this (very obvious, thanks) flaw in my body. But still, they are liars.

Behold, the bump of 2012:

Note that I only look preggers on the left side of my stomach.

I mean, we're a far cry from the bump of 2010:

But I'm sure that no one's going to disagree with me that the (lopsided, thanks) bump of 2012 is a real thing and not just in my head.

I have my next scan in about 3 weeks. I'm curious to find out if my bump getting bigger is a result of my tumor getting bigger, or if it's just me eating too much cake combined with an unfortunate hernia that's making me even more pokey-outy. The upside? I can still breathe. So even if this tumor is growing, no way is it 22 pounds. ... This was the voice of experience, people. As long as I can breathe, I can live with a malignant growth inside me. (No pun intended, I promise.)