Monday, December 3, 2012

December 3

My mother would like me to correct my previous reference to a hotdog-sized growth in my back.

She did the centimeters to inches conversion and it seems that I exaggerated the size of whatever that is back there.

It's not a hotdog. It's more like a Vienna sausage. (I can't even type that without gagging. For some reason, the thought of a Vienna sausage in my backside makes me queasy.) ... Or maybe it's like a Tootsie Roll. Not the midget, and not the big, fat Tootsie... but the longish, skinny, all one solid tube of Tootsie matter kind of Tootsie Roll.

So, there you have it. It's not a hotdog.