This mascara:
Flakes right off a girl's eyelashes. (If that girl is me, that is.) I didn't use to notice it as much, but I'm here to tell you... when a girl has one of those days where she's constantly putting her face in her hands and wondering what's going on with her life, this mascara starts dropping off in big, flaky flakes. And it's not attractive.
This mascara:
Has a new nickname, and that nickname is McSmeary. ... Now, don't get me wrong, if a girl is having a normal, non-emotional day, this is good stuff. But if, say, a girl has this on her eyelashes on the very same day that she finds out that neither her cancer center nor the oncologist she's proposed to are on the list of preferred providers of her new insurance plan... Smear City.
This mascara:
Used to be my best friend. Honestly, we were together for years in the late 80's and early 90's. This was my go-to mascara for a decade or more. I only knew of two kinds of mascara when I was in high school, and "the stuff in the pink and green tube" didn't do it for me. ... It turns out, neither does this. Either my eyelashes have aged, or I cry more now than I used to. (And I'm here to tell you, I was a crazy crying adolescent.) Whatever it is, the trusty blue Professional mascara isn't helping me look like a professional - you know, since I can cry off a double layer in about 3 minutes.
I tell you, I've gone through three tubes of mascara this week. Not "gone through", as in "actually used the whole tube"... but at the end of the day, every day, I've come home and picked up a tube of mascara and thrown it in the trash.
Not that I'm blaming the mascara companies for my flaky, smeary, just-plain-not-staying-on issues with their products. Hello, I'm a crying machine this week. (Okay, always. But this week has been a doozy.) I'm just saying, in my time of emotional duress, I've found that these three brands all found different ways to not stay on my eyelashes.
Again, I'm not blaming the manufacturers for not being able to keep up with my tear ducts. I'm just saying... if you cry a lot, then these three mascaras may not be for you.
All I can say is that we (yes, I'm invoking the royal "we") are way past ready to stop looking like this:
And go back to looking like this:
(It's staggering, isn't it, how much longer my eyelashes look when I haven't cried or rubbed my make-up off? Honestly, the difference is unreal.)
Tomorrow I'm going back to this tried and true favorite:
Wish me luck. (With both the not crying and the mascara. Heaven - and everyone who reads this blog - knows how much I need it!)
